Drives Me Crazy

What drives you crazy?

If you asked me a year ago, I would name a full list of things that drive me crazy, like my husband’s socks on the floor, open toothpaste by the sink with no lid to be find, my PMS, yes that means my period knocking on my door, sticky jam all over my kitchen counter – a message left by my husband for me to know, he had toast with jam for breakfast. But no more, I became fully aware of all this little things driving me crazy are part of being alive, breathing and living life. And by that, I mean my own life, living with my husband and dealing with my own hormones.

But I will tell you, something has been driving me crazy for a year now. I’m frustrated and exhausted from it. I tell you, what really drives me crazy. It calls – Pain and Discomfort. It calls – Mouth ulcers. Never had them before.

I have been suffering from Mouth ulcers on my tongue and I will not post any pictures here, because if you saw it you would go ‘ Ouch’ or ‘ Crap’ and some of you would use some swear word – it would make sense you know, you would understand my pain. Trust me you don’t want to see it. But for those of you, who do not know what mouth ulcers are; they are painful round or oval sores that form in the mouth, most often on the inside of the cheeks or lips. (What I would give for having it on the cheeks or lips instead!) Oral ulcers appear largely for unknown reasons. Mouth ulcers cause pain and discomfort, in my case, having in on my tongue, it unable me to speak, drink and eat. Yes, read it again I said SPEAK – I can’t speak. Only when you get a big sore on your tongue, only then you learn that tongue never stays still. Even when I am not drinking, eating or speaking, even when totally relaxed, the tongue is moving. Through this year I visited few doctors and tried numerous of medicines. From all kinds of gels, mouthwashes, tablets to herbal teas and gargles. And if you know of some kind of remedy, that I haven’t tried yet, please share and I will give it a go. I am so desperate for a treatment, that even if you would try to fool me with some nonsense remedy, you would surely succeed.

It is a painful, unbearable stinging pain, every time my tongue touches teeth or gums or even when I yawn and the tongue’s muscle stretches, it feels like the ulcer is tearing apart deeper. Sneezing is out of this world, as I’m trying to hold my tongue still, to make sure it doesn’t rub against anything in my mouth, I sneeze with my mouth wide open. Yeah, so elegant. Talking became a luxury I cannot afford at the time I have an ulcer. Even my husband misses me talking, how unbelievable. ‘Baby I never seen you so silent’ holding silence for 6 to 7 days, that is a serious time for a talkative person like me. Ulcers come to me now regularly, like every month, are you thinking what Im thinking? Resembles a similar periodic appearance of menstruation, I know.

Well mouth ulcers drive me crazy, I get very frustrated unable to enjoy daily life. Frustrated by the pain and discomfort caused. Sometime I cry from the stinging, burning, agonising, raw pain. Sometimes I cry from the helplessness. Drives me crazy, makes me annoyed, irritated, powerless, frustrated, vulnerable, weak, paralysed, unable, upset and my poor husband then deals with it all.

I think my husband should write a post – She Drives Me Crazy

Read my favourite, highly annoyed Edward Hotspur’s post  here. 

3 thoughts on “Drives Me Crazy

  1. Awww…. so sorry to hear that! it doesn’t sound good! I never had this, but every time something goes off in my body (esp those things that keep coming back), I try to think of internal reasons, like, you know, they say you get sore throat when you hold off saying something out loud, back pain when you do not have enough stability in life, etc…. not saying there’s always a trend, but there may be smth to think about.

    About remedies, I love the German homeopathic Heel series, especiallyTraumeel: http://www.heel.ca/Heel-ca-Traumeel.html?ActiveID=10007121. The cream is great for when you have any injuries, etc, but I take the pills (you let them dissolve under your tongue) for almost every reason – bitten tongue, sore throat, dental problems – works like magic for me (have you seen the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding? When the family used that glass cleansing spray or something for whatever the issue was? This is pretty much what I do with Traumeel. Dunno if they have it in the UAE, but just in case). Get well soon!

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  2. Sofia, thats great help! I will definitely look for this medicine. Thank you so much, really appreciate. But I do agree with the underlying issue, much deeper problem. I believe in those psychological reasons, like not saying something that is important to me out loud. Or something from the past I didn’t say and it has been burning my tongue since then. I’m ruled by my emotions and I can make myself ill. I need to be aware of what the problem is exactly, in order to solve the problem. I think getting back to regular practice and meditation, will also help me to cleanse and build my immunity. I didn’t practise yoga for a year also, as I had bad injury.

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  3. Pingback: Daily Prompt: She Drives Me Crazy | Nola Roots, Texas Heart

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