Hooo are You ?

Totally Night Owl. Also, trying hard to live on early bird schedule (my husband) otherwise we would never actually see eachother. I wish I liked waking up in the mornings, or morning people, or my annoying husband at those way too early hours of the day .. I do.

But for me It’s easier to stay awake all night long, then to wake up. I get angry when woken up, then spend my whole day exhausted, moody, sleepy, unpleasant. Until 7 PM. Time I awaken. (The very same time my husband snoozes off on the sofa in front of the TV) Time I come fully alive and become mindful. My energy rising. My creativity flowing. I start thinking, loving, dreaming, working, creating, playing, writing. I go for a run or I clean the house. I play with my cats and come up with new amazing ideas. I study. I visualise. I plan. I want to go out, hypnotised by the moon. My eyes wide open, my mind truly aware, enjoying the stillness, my own solitude and mystery of the night time.

2 AM I realize it’s a bad idea staying up so late, knowing even all the coffee beans in Starbucks (that is if I find it- read here) won’t make me a morning person. I know for sure, I will regret and suffer the very same zombie effect the next day again. So I go to bed, I lie next to my snoring husband quietly, pushing my cat off my pillow gently. I close my eyes .. One sheep, two sheep .. ‘Ping’ I slide to unlock my phone to read my emails. I adjust the screen brightness, mute the phone and post tweets hash-tagged #ICantSleep then open an Instagram to check all new photos posted by my friends. Before I know it, I hear the birds in the garden begin twittering. It is 4.30 AM – OMG I did it again. Time to sleep, I push my phone under my pillow.. By 6 AM I fall asleep deeply and beautifully into the new day.

Then again I wake up tired and go to bed wide awake.

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In response to Daily Prompt: Are you a night owl or are you the early bird?

Where to Be or Where Not to Be

That’s is the true question I ask myself everyday. This question lies heavy upon me and I’m overwhelmed with all my options. I walked, tasted, smelled, touched many beautiful landscapes. Explored cities, travelled countries and fallen in love with places. I lived and  adapted to diffrent cultures, accepted the truth of me as Not the Homecoming Kind. I moved spontanuasly, my relocations happened on emotional impulse, impulse telling me to go. And my build-in compass told me Where to go everytime. I never analysed it and never questioned the choices I made. Just packed and went with the wind. It was easy.

Recently my style has changed. A lot. I feel lost and confused by this new approach to my changeful life. Obsessed with this one question. And it has a huge effect on my soul and state of my mind. I think and rethink my next steps more carefully, I put my new ideas under the microscope and calculate my next move. I analyse deeply where I want to go next and what environment do I want to live in. Seems like I want make some super wise decision that will tick all the boxes – searching for a place of perfection that doesn’t exist, which changes the way I pick my paths. I am getting strong impulse to go, but not receiving any signals from my compass on where.

Could it be that places give us peace of mind, a happiness? I thought happiness is inside my heart no matter where I go, I take it with me. But could my happiness depend on where I am? If so, am I where I should be?

Where to be or Where not to be ? 

Don’t get confused, I have a suspicion it started with that awkward age I reached last summer. Am I running out of places I could live in or am I looking for the perfect nest?

In response to Daily Prompt: Can’t get it out of my head 

Lookin’ Out My Back Door

Looking out my back doors, I see the reason why I moved here. My garden. The garden is the reason why I went thru stressful relocation of our four cats from Hong Kong to Dubai. I wanted to give them a better life, no just more space, but outdoors life. Now when I look outside I understand, I gave them more then just a garden. I gave them a whole new world of hunting, running, climbing and chasing smaller creatures in the grass. With flies and birds flying into the garden, I have discovered their hunting skills, I never knew they had. Looking out my back door I see an environment full of opportunities to hunt, to run, to jump, to explore. Thru eyes of a cat.

Every time I look thru the doors into my garden to find them all stretched out napping so relaxed, I know, undertaking a very stressful long distance journey was all worth it and the view of my cats in the garden is my reward. That is what I see when looking out my back doors, my happy cats.

But if you looked yourself into my garden you would have a very different view. You would see a lovely good-size garden with very inviting space to relax, to read a book or to enjoy a glass of wine in garden gazebo. You would see a garden with peaceful and quiet atmosphere, surrounded by trees and flowers, listening to the little birds twittering.

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In response to Daily Prompt: Lookin’ Out My Back Door 

Are You Fashion Forward Ready?

FFWD is the only Fashion kind I know of, that never arrives fashionably late. Yes, the time has come to talk fashion, I know, we have never actually stopped talking about fashion. But for the 3rd time we can talk fashion while taking high tea with designers and buyers in the Fashion Café.

Are you going forward for the FFWD 3rd edition?

Do you have your best outfits ready for the 3 day event, full of catwalk presentations, inspiring talks and panel discussions as well as the parties? Do you have your act together so striking or impressive to turn heads during fashion shows? Well, get ready, because we are all proud of being a part of FFWD from the very begging and following two extremely successful seasons, the creators behind Dubai’s most amazing fashion event, will bring you oh-so-much-more extravaganza in SEASON THREE.

So while you sitting there with your hair rollers in and your nails drying, see everything you need to know about Fashion Forward, check the schedule for all the events not to be missed in FFWD’s 3rd edition! I bet, you don’t want to miss out on chatting to British fashion model and style icon Alexa Chung, during a question and answer session entitled In Conversation With Alexa Chung. See, I told you so, now, hurry up and register for a chance to attend Alexa’s talk!

For all information on schedule, registration, talks and designers visit www.fashionforward.com  20140227_Fashion-Forward-2014

Register, get your tickets, dress to impress, hang your best designer bag over your shoulder and indulge in everything fashion for 3 days in FFWD season three at The Madinat Jumeirah, Dubai from April 10-13

Change your word to change your world

I got lost. I turn into a person who’s the opposite of who I normally am. Or that’s just my Dark-side of me, I didn’t know I had and now, I will share it with you all. I have criticised a place, I have blamed others, I gave an opinion with all the bad energy of my word behind it. I said you were fake, empty and lifeless. And you have accepted my opinion and gave me exactly that. But I know only hurt people hurt and I hurt you, because I was hurting inside. I was tired, stressed and full of emotional pain caused by a disappointment and change. I wanted it to be easy and painless transition. But it wasn’t easy and I have become a destroyer of everything around me with my harsh words.
All my life I used my words to create the most beautiful dream, that I was living. I shared love, I spoke love, I saw beauty everywhere. So when have I enslaved myself to negative thoughts? Did my emotional state turn me against myself? Feeding myself with my own poison, living in the past and blind to the truth. My own words slowly building the walls of hate closing on me, I’m suffocating, I can barely breathe.
The truth was, it was me who was fake, empty and lifeless. I insulted you and you insulted me back. I was selfish with you, you were selfish with me. Missing my dream of the past so much, that I am unable to see and enjoy the dream that was happening for me right now.

ImageI know If I love you, then you will love me back.

If I look up to you, you will look up to me.

If I accept you, you will accept me.

Morning cup of thoughts

In the car this A.M. me and my husband, it is lovely sunny morning and we are on our way to work. I glance at the clock on the radio, actually only at the minutes digits and realize we are good with the time and could use those spare minutes to go grab a coffee before we get into the office. I mean, life doesn’t get better then having Starbucks grande late before you start the day. My husband tells me we already pass it and its too far behind us. So I quickly remembered my friend told me very recently, there is a new Starbucks in JLT – the area where our office is located but on the other side, in cluster Y. My husband turns the car around in a quest for Starbucks.

We arrive at cluster Y and drive around looking for signs of Starbucks, but it doesn’t seem like there is one here, so we stop and ask the car-park employee ‘Good morning, excuse me do you know where is the Starbucks around here? He looks at me ‘Star .. ?’ I say loud and clear ‘Starbucks please’ He shakes his head of not understanding or more likely of not knowing what exactly am I asking for, like he had never heard of Starbucks. So we move on to some two shop employees standing outside, interrupting they conservation ‘Sorry guys do you know where Starbucks is?’ I smile. They both pause and stare at me ‘Star What?’ At this point I think; is it me or these people just walked out of a cave? I repeat ‘Starbucks please’ They gaze at each-other ‘Star.. Whaaaaat ?’ both confused by my out of this world question, scanning the surroundings for some clue or something.

Maybe for an escape. I definitely need a coffee now, it will not fix these people but at least it will wake me up, because this just cannot be real!

My Coffeeology.

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This year I’m looking for a Horse-Shoe

Another year has past (Year of the Snake) a year that has been action packed and pretty rough. Looking back, I wonder now if my guardian angel took a year off and went for a vacation or wherever it is that guardian angels go when they aren’t answering my prayers. For us the year 2013 was all about relocating from Hong Kong to Dubai, opening our new office and settling into our new home for more “kinda-grownups” life. Whatever that means.

Steven, my husband has spent the year redefining the phrase of “working hard” expanding the company. Fifteen-hour days have become the norm for Steve and every once in a while, he took a weekend off. He spent most of the first 6 months in Dubai and if I wasn’t with him I have stayed in Hong Kong most of the time alone and didn’t even border to put his suitcase away. When in Hong Kong I assisted to our business registration for UAE by running around visiting lawyers, embassies and foreigner affaire offices, getting all documents requested by Dubai, daily. All of that effort, time, money spent, sacrifice and energy!

I’m still waiting for the big payoff that will land me in a huge palace and a driver in uniform and white gloves with sweet ride, chef-prepared dinners daily and most importantly a never-ending wardrobe allowance! I hope that arrives with the year of the Wooden Horse. Ever the Dubai Office, Steven clearly takes on the challenge to do the impossible, so I have figured out that the chances of his working schedule changing are about as great as me becoming a International Pop Star. Most of the year and the money was spent on our new life, new home and business in Dubai. Focused on what we will gain instead of what we will lose, blindly trusting the cost-of-living calculator. Maybe we considered moving to Dubai to be closer to friends and family or to start a family ourselves and just maybe, the real reason will stay untold. When I made this decision of relocating I had to think almost exclusively about what we will gain by going to the new city, but psychologically I was affected much more by what I was about to lose. However my scale of life values decided about my priorities, so I packed up all my things, grabbed our four cats (I wish it was as easy done as said) and headed to another country. Yet, again.

I found coming to Dubai one of my hardest transitions. Thinking about what I was actually willing to give up for untold reason. I knew it was going to be hard. But I decided to ignore it and go ahead with the choice anyway. I have learnt that each relocation is really about giving up stuff, but giving up a dream?

We finally relocated for good in June.

Char Sui Noodle Soup got replaced with hummus and bread. Streets full of people, are now replaced by emptiness. Short skirts with full lengths. Typhoons by Sandstorms. Walking doesn’t exist here. Calls don’t get returned, emails don’t get replies. You feel as thought you are spending your days stuck or running around but not getting nowhere. You try your best to rise above it and get through with some of your sense of humor left. Then pizzas, kebabs, McDonalds help. I get my quick fix with junk food thinking tomorrow will be better. On top of that I reached my 30’s without knowing how to age gracefully. I would like to think I still have some time to find out ..

The year wasn’t all too bad but it definitely was a hard and a stressful one. With Snake in charge, probably me trying to make a career change, was not a good idea either. Im just glad the Horse is coming. I can Pick myself up and dust myself off from last year’s fights with the Snake.

Now out with the old and in with the new 

My List of Goals For 2014:Image

What are your goals? Will you Hire a personal trainer? Join a dance class? Or get back into that childhood sport you loved so much? I wish you all a Lucky Year of the Wooden Horse and Instant success when the horse arrives! Kung Hei Fat Choi!

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