How to be what we are Not

Holding in my feelings to spare someone else’s makes me sick. My energy is now trapped, because I did not let it go direct. If directness is honesty, does that mean I lied? Yes, to myself. I have found myself in unpleasant and uncomfortable situation, where I spent my time with someone, I did not want to be with. I did not enjoy one second of it and thought of hundreds of better things and activities I could do instead.

I like to be honest with others, however I got stuck and felt I could not express myself with love, if I was direct. I blocked myself from doing so. In a fear of hurting someone, I said nothing and hurt myself. Now I suffer from my dishonesty to myself. This powerful force of disagreement within myself feels heavy in my stomach. I can not tolerate myself for creating this knot of energies and question my own inner truth.

Only truthfulness could help, but I felt lost for words to soften the truth. I have chosen silence rather then honesty. So I happened to be what I am not, doing things I don’t want to do. Lesson learnt: Always connect with your true feelings and be honest with others.

10 Things I learnt when Stuck in an Airport

  1. Don’t make friends they will take off in next 1 hour or so And leave you behind
  2. You will see lots of suspicious behaviour and many terrorist looking-like people
  3. You will learn there is such a thing as power pillars where you can charge your phone
  4. You will realise there is not many shops on checking side of the airport
  5. You will learn Chinese people never travel light
  6. The best place to just wait around would be a Starbucks if you could get a seat
  7. You will reply to all your emails and Facebook messages
  8. You will go thru all your applications looking for any kind of entertainment
  9. You will call everyone you can think of just to share your drama and chit chat
  10. You will write a list of  “Things to Do when Stuck in an Airport”

waiting area